Demo Reel

Well, I finally obtained footage from two of my films that are out on DVD and cut together a demo reel!  The goal was to show a wide emotional range and keep the video to 3 minutes.  After all these years, I'm glad to finally have a reel, and I look forward to the release of some of my other films - especially The Senior Prank - so I can use footage from them.

It's amazing how long it took me to put the reel together.  The point of a reel is to show your best acting, to keep it focused on yourself as much as possible, and to keep it fast-paced and interesting.  To that end, I chipped away at the scenes that I used, cutting out any unnecessary dialog from other actors while maintaining the flow of the scene so it still made sense.  I cut a few seconds here, several seconds there, and kept reviewing it objectively ("you know, that whole part really doesn't have to be in there...").

It was a challenge, but I finally cut away as much as I thought I could and got it down to 3 minutes.  I also cleaned up my resume quite a bit, made some improvements to my website, created a channel on Vimeo to feature my reel and other performance videos, and FINALLY submitted an acting application for the Kendricks' new movie.  Yesterday was quite productive!

If any of you want some information about putting together a demo reel, I found this article to be VERY helpful.  I also watched the demo reels of some friends of mine who are professional actors, and took points from each when deciding how to do mine.

Anyway, if you want to see my reel, here it is...

CW Film Festival Selections!

I am very excited to announce that "The Wednesday Morning Breakfast Club," "In His Steps," and "Hero" have been accepted as feature films to be screened at the Christian Worldview Film Festival in March, as well as the promo video for "Polycarp: Destroyer of Gods"!  After being involved in the industry and networking with these filmmakers in Texas for four years, it is very exciting to finally have some of my films screen at the festival.  (This is technically a new festival, but many of the same people will be in attendance who came regularly to the SAICFF in past years.)

"Hero" was my first feature film, way back in 2010.  I helped as a Props PA for a week of pickup filming, and was chosen at the last minute to serve hot dogs at a concession stand for the big baseball game at the end of the film, giving me my first film debut!  I have four seconds of screen time as a featured extra!  :-)  I find it pretty neat that my screen debut and my first leading role (TWMBC) will be screening at the same festival.  :-)

I am also very excited for many of my other friends who will have films showing at the festival as well!  It's always a very fun event, much like a huge family reunion.  I must say, it is blissful to be surrounded by thousands of other Christian filmmakers.  What a blessing to share the same passions and be serving the Lord together in this industry!

And just for fun, here are pictures taken before we shot my scene in "Hero"...

Watching Yourself in a Film

I have been asked several times what it feels like to watch myself in a film.  The answer?  

It depends on the film.  :-)

Seriously, though, I believe this is an important topic to be addressed.  It's a strange thing to watch yourself on the screen, especially for the first time.  I have given this matter much thought, and here's what I want to say to you...

Don't expect to watch yourself in a film and get the same feeling you do from watching a Hollywood movie starring actors you've never met.

If you act in a film and think, "Wow, I'm going to be just like Harrison Ford or Kate Winslet!" - you're going to be more than slightly disappointed when you watch the final product.  Well, for one, they probably have more training and definitely more experience than you do, but also, YOU CAN'T FOOL YOURSELF.

You might give a great performance, but you still know it's just YOU, and on top of that, you remember every detail that went into filming each scene.  When you have intimate knowledge of what was going on behind the scenes of a film, it can't carry the same magic.  You remember every mishap, every retake, every funny blooper that went into making the film.

When you watch actors in big films (or even little films), it's easy to suspend disbelief and step into the fake world of the film.  We know that Robert Downey Jr. is just an actor pretending to be Iron Man or Sherlock Holmes, but we are easily transported into his world and made to believe that he is those characters.  But when Robert Downey Jr. watches himself in those films, he probably feels much like you or I do when we watch ourselves perform.

And if you're a normal person - you're going to be your own worst critic.  But instead of beating yourself up over facial expressions you wish you hadn't made, or physical gestures you wish you HAD made, give yourself grace and use it as an opportunity to learn and improve.

You're not perfect.  Hollywood actors aren't perfect either.  They can give great performances, but I'm sure they have plenty of moments when they watch themselves and cringe, even when we see it as a flawless performance.

Oh, and guess what?  You don't have to be Harrison Ford or Kate Winslet or Robert Downey Jr.  You're awesome just being YOU.  Be who God made you to be and don't try to be someone you're not.  Embrace your own personality and characteristics and unique physical qualities, and bring that to the table when you're interpreting a character.  That's when you will give your best performance.

But to answer the original question -- what does it feel like to watch myself on the screen -- honestly, I'm a little bit terrified whenever I sit down to watch myself in a film for the first time.  My stomach gets tight and my heart starts racing.  Usually, my primary emotion afterward is a sense of relief -- "Oh good!  I wasn't terrible!" (Not that I expect myself to be terrible, but there are always scenes that I'm concerned about.)  It's a strange sensation ("Wait, I was in a movie?") but also very exciting ("Oh my goodness, I was in a movie!").  After all the time you spent investing your heart and soul into the project, and all the months (or years) spent waiting afterwards, it's very rewarding to see the outcome of the hard work that everyone on the cast and crew poured into the production.

Bottom line:  Have realistic expectations when you watch yourself in a film.  Give yourself credit for working hard and doing a good job!  If you see areas where you can improve, turn it into a positive instead of a negative experience.  Take notes for next time but don't let it discourage you or feed insecurities.  Give yourself grace.  Enjoy the film.  Cherish your memories of the project (hopefully they're good ones!).  And then move on.

These are just my thoughts and observations.  If anyone else has something to add to this, I'd love to hear your comments!  :-)

Know Your Standards and Stick by Them - Part 2

Today I'm going to address another big issue (mostly for girls) -- how are you willing to dress for a film?

I was raised fairly conservatively, and I know that some of you were, too.  [Others of you don't share the same concerns.  Feel free to skip this post.]  This post is NOT to tell people how they should or should not dress.  My purpose is to encourage my readers to stand by their convictions, whatever they may be.  For some of you, that will simply mean refusing to do nudity.  For others, that will mean not wearing skirts/shorts higher than your knees.  Either way, my point remains the same, and I will use personal examples of my own fairly-conservative standards to illustrate that point.

I've had to grapple with wardrobe issues on several of my films.  I never wore tight pants or skinny jeans until I had to wear them for a movie.  I wasn't very comfortable in them, but I couldn't really argue against it since I was playing a modern day teenager and I had to sell the look.  However, I drew the line at wearing short skirts or low-cut tops (because that is my personal preference - just using this as an example).  I respectfully communicated those preferences to the wardrobe supervisor beforehand and she very graciously tried to respect my wishes and make sure I was comfortable.

Girls, I'm going to speak honestly here.  If you're desiring to dress modestly in your own personal life, maybe you've found that it isn't always easy.  Maybe you've been tempted, as I have, to dress in a way that is more alluring - wearing tighter clothes, or dropping that neckline a little, or buying that cute dress even though it's a just a *few* inches shorter than what you normally wear.

This isn't a modesty talk, but I just want to tell you that those temptations are even more intensified on a film set because you think you can justify it.  "It's for a movie.  They're telling me to wear these clothes.  It will be all right."  And secretly you'll get excited at the chance to dress more sexy and blame it on the wardrobe department.

That is why you have to firmly decide in your mind which lines will NOT be crossed before you are faced with that temptation.

If possible, it is important to communicate with the wardrobe supervisor beforehand to respectfully outline your preferences and ask if your clothes for the film can stay within certain boundaries.  You certainly don't want to show up on set AFTER all of your clothes have been bought and THEN say, "Oh by the way, I won't wear that skirt, or that top, or those shorts."  You might have an angry wardrobe supervisor on your hands, and potentially a crisis on set if you're supposed to start filming and there's nothing for you to wear.

If you had addressed the issue beforehand and you are still presented with troublesome pieces of clothing, try respectfully offering a solution.  Some examples:

Shirt too low: "Can I wear a cami with this?"
Skirt too short: "Can I put on some leggings or skinny jeans with this?"

If you're kind and respectful, and show appreciation for all of their hard work, the wardrobe personnel will be much more likely to try and accommodate you.

Again, I will emphasize the importance of RESPECT.  Every person on the crew is working hard to make the film a success, and I believe that we as actors need to do what we can to make the crew's job easier.

Honestly, for most low-budget indie films, you'll be asked to bring your own wardrobe and this won't be a problem.  But for bigger-budget films where they buy your wardrobe, this has the potential to be an issue and you have to be ready for that.

Bottom line: If you have modesty standards, be prepared to potentially fight that battle within yourself and resist the temptation to compromise in areas that you know you really don't want to compromise in.

Remember - just like I addressed in my last post - ladies, this is YOUR BODY we are talking about.  Don't let yourself feel forced or bullied into compromising in a way that you will regret.  This is film, and it will be captured for all of posterity to see.  But the most important thing is that you are honoring the LORD.  Seek His guidance, and stand strong.

Know Your Standards and Stick by Them - Part 1

One of the biggest pieces of advice that I would give to young or beginning actors would be this:

Know your standards and be ready to stand strong under pressure.

Today I'm going to address physical interaction between actors.

What kind of activities are you willing to engage in for a movie?  Are you willing to kiss someone?  Are you willing to be shown sharing a bed with the actor playing your husband/wife (perhaps you're not physically touching, or perhaps you're sleeping in each other's arms)?  Are you willing to act out a scene, either romantic in nature or an attack of molestation, where you as a man are having to run your hands over a woman's body, or you as a woman are on the receiving end of that?  Are you willing to simulate a rape scene (even with no nudity shown)?

You get the idea.

There are lots of possible scenarios that you might be uncomfortable with, or that might go against your personal standards of physical interaction with the opposite sex.  Maybe you think this won't be an issue because you've decided to do strictly Christian films.  I hate to break it to you, but I've read Christian scripts that have contained all of the above, and I've had to make choices and turn roles down.  It's not easy, but if God has led you to have certain standards, He will bless you for adhering to them.

Please note:  I'm not here to say what should or should not be shown in a movie, but I'm talking to you as the actor who would be the one carrying out these actions.

What are you willing to do?  What would you NOT be willing to do?  You need to make those hard and fast decisions BEFORE you set foot in an audition room or on a film set.  Because more than likely, you are going to be asked to compromise your standards and you have to be ready for that.  If you're wishy-washy about where you draw the line, then when that moment of pressure comes, you are more likely to compromise and do something you might regret later.

Also, you might find yourself WANTING to kiss that insanely good-looking actor playing your romantic interest, so if you want to save your kisses exclusively for your spouse, you need to have that already firmly set in your mind to help you fight temptation.  ;-)

Once you know what you will and will not do, you need to be upfront about that with the director.  If you get offered a part in a film, some of the mostly likely or prevalent issues need to be addressed before you sign a contract.

If you've read the script and there's no kissing mentioned for your character (for example), then you probably don't have anything to worry about.  If they spring a kiss on you at the last minute while you're filming (and it was NOT in the script when you signed the contract), then you are more justified in respectfully refusing to do it.  Sometimes you're not allowed to read a script until after you sign a contract (which is a dangerous scenario in itself unless you know and trust the director), so that's a situation where you definitely need to address some of those big issues first.

You don't need to rattle off your list, like "I WILL NOT do x, y, or z..."  Instead, start by asking questions ("What kind of physical contact does my character have with other characters in the script?"), or just say, "By the way, I wanted to let you know that I'm not comfortable doing x, y, or z.  Is that going to be a problem?"

The key here is RESPECT.  Please don't act self-righteous or assume the air of a diva.  Even if the director thinks your standards are stupid and he's not happy about having to recast the part because you aren't willing to do what he wanted, you'll leave a much better impression if you were kind, humble, and respectful.

Again, I'm not trying to tell anyone what their standards should be. I simply used examples to help illustrate my points.  

Bottom line:  Pray.  Decide between you and the Lord where you draw the lines.  Then stick to your guns!

And remember this...

You are valuable.  You are created in the image of God (Gen. 1:27).  Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit (1 Cor. 6:19-20).  You are in control of your body and who is allowed to touch it.  You are not owned by a director.  Do not let anyone bully you or try to force you into doing something you are not comfortable with.  If you're a non-confrontational people-pleaser like me, it's hard to say no, but it's better than living with regrets.

And if you need any reminders about what a valuable person you are, click HERE for a great bullet point list of what the Bible says about your identity in Christ.  :-)

Headshot Tips, Part Two

Here are some more headshot tips from pro photographer, Peter Hurley!  I found these two videos to be incredibly helpful, both as an actress and as a photographer.  I will be putting these techniques into action the next time I'm being photographed, and any time I'm taking portraits of someone.  Enjoy!

2013 in Review

2013 was an amazing year, so full of films and acting adventures!  God has blessed me beyond measure.  Here's a recap of the projects and film festivals and special screenings I was able to be a part of this past year...

FEBRUARY

San Antonio Independent Christian Film Festival.

Also the world premiere of "Alone Yet Not Alone" 

(cast and crew in attendance pictured below)

APRIL

Featured role in feature film "77 Chances" (formerly "Letting Go") in Virginia.

Background extra for 8 days on the pilot for AMC's new TV show, "Turn," in Virginia.

MAY - JUNE

Supporting role in feature film "In His Steps" in Colorado.

Leading role in a Doctor Who fan film!!! (Also in Colorado)

JULY

Supporting role in feature film "Uncommon" in Virginia.

Featured role in feature film "Polycarp: Destroyer of Gods" in Ohio.

AUGUST

Leading role in hour-long film "My House" in Virginia.

Leading role in short film "Rules for Small Groups" in Virginia.

SEPTEMBER

Supporting role in short film "Trafficked: A Model Story" in Virginia.

Lead role in short film "Blind Faith" in Virginia.

OCTOBER

Lead role in short film "Love Keeper" in Virginia.

NOVEMBER

 1950's music video with musician Jay Daniels in Virginia.

Another very exciting part of the year was getting to watch my first two big films as a leading actress!  In June I attended a cast and crew screening of "Touched by Grace," and in August I watched the DVD of "The Wednesday Morning Breakfast Club" for the first time.

Here's to new and exciting adventures in 2014!!!

"I don't know what my future holds, but I know who holds my future."  

Knowing that God is in control is good enough for me.  :-)